Bohemian Rhapsody
by penguin of death
Summary: What happens when Ron is arrested for murder? This is a one-shot songfic to the infamous Queen song!


b okay, so this is a fic I did a while ago for another site, but thought I would post here too. It's my response to a challenge from Elmo/TheSheps (she has two names) in which we both agreed to write a fic to Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen because it doeesn't seem to have been done before. Oh well, enjoy! /b 

i DISCLAIMER – JKR owns the characters, Queen own the songs, I own nothing but some flying monkeys… /i 

Ron hugged Hermione tightly, staring at the sight before him. He couldn't believe what he'd just done. Lucius Malfoy lay in a pool of blood at the foot of the steps. He'd had no other choice, he knew that; Malfoy had been aiming his wand at Hermione, getting as far as Adav- when Ron had pulled out his own weapon to protect the woman he loved. Then he timidly spoke, 'Is this the real life, is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality…'

Hermione looked up at him, tears in her eyes, 'Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see …'

But Ron pulled away from her, 'I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy, because I'm easy come, easy go, a little high, little low. Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me, to me…'

They stood in silence, the wind swirling around them as they gazed up at the starry night sky awaiting the dementors they knew were on their way.

The very next day, Ron was dragged into the court room in one of the many towers of Azkaban. His family sat in the front row of the balcony, and as his captors strapped him into the wooden chair in the centre of the room, he looked up at his mother.

'Mama, just killed a man, put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger now he's dead.'

The jury sat forward in their seats, listening intently to the young man's apparent confession.

'Mama, life had just begun, but now I've gone and thrown it all away…'

Just at that, the minister of magic entered the room, and the trial got underway. Ron's lawyer argued that he had only carried out his actions to protect his fiancée from a notorious known death eater, but Malfoy's lawyer had of course already blackmailed half of the jury. Ron looked up to see tears flowing down Mrs Weasley's cheeks, as she sat grasping Hermione's hand.

'Mama, oooo, didn't mean to make you cry,' Ron pleaded, 'If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters…'

The jury took only ten minutes to deliberate, probably owing to the fact most of them were blackmailed and had already made up their minds. When the foreman announced the verdict of guilty, Mrs Wealsey howled with tears. Ron looked up at her once more, trying to comfort her as best he could, as the dementors enclosed on him,

'Too late, my time has come, sends shivers down my spine, body's aching all the time.'

He turned to face everyone in the courtroom, 'Goodbye everybody, I've got to go, gotta leave you all behind and face the truth. Mama, ooo…'

'Anywhere the wind blows…' Hermione said quietly to herself, as she watched her fiancé be slowly led toward the doors of the room.

Ron looked to the jury and judge once more, with fear in his eyes, 'I don't want to die, I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all…'

At this, Ron's best friend Harry suddenly stood up on his seat in the audience and shouted, 'I see a little silhouetto of a man!'

The judge looked him in the eye, 'Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango?'

The dementors had stopped, and Ron found himself standing still by the doors. He shuddered at the icy breeze radiating from them, 'Thunderbolt and lightning, very very frightening me!'

The judge looked to the sky, almost like he was praying, and cried in exasperation 'Galileo!'

The jury looked at him in confusion, 'Galileo?'

'Galileo.' He repeated.

This time the entire audience stood, trying to understand what was going on, 'Galileo?'

The judge sat back down, sighing 'Galileo figaro magnifico!'

Ron decided this was as good a time as any, and so stepping forward and tentatively approaching the bench he started, 'I'm just a poor boy from a poor family…'

Harry and Hermione stood on their seats and chorused 'He's just a poor boy from a poor family, spare him his life from this monstrosity!'

'Easy come, easy go' said Ron, looking from the judge to the dementors, 'Will you let me go?'

The dementors closed in around him, 'Bismillah! No, we will not let you go!'

'Let him go!' cried his friends.

'Bismillah! No, we will not let you go!' the dementors were so close that shivers were shooting up his spine.

'Let him go!'

'Bismillah! We will not let you go!'

'Let me go!' Ron pleaded as his captors grabbed him by the wrists and began to pull him back to the door.

'We will not let you go!'

'Let me go!'

'We will not let you go!'

'Let me go!'

'No, no, no, no, no, no, no!'

As the doors slammed open, Ron was pushed along a dark, stone corridor. He knew where he was heading, down to the terrifying prison cells of Azkaban. 'Mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go!'

The dementors paused and he turned around to see that the whole trial audience had followed him out into the corridor, and so he screamed, 'Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me! For me! For me!'

One of the dementors shoved Ron's shoulder hard, causing him to stumble and fall onto the cold hard floor. As he pulled himself up he yelled to both the dementors and the members of the jury, 'So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye? So you think you can love me and leave me to die? Oh baby, can't do this to me baby! Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here!'

He found himself being dragged along the corridor, until he reached an open doorway at the top of a flight of stairs. He grasped onto the doorframe, struggling against the robed creatures' grips, screaming back along the corridor to the crowd which had remained outside the courtroom, 'Nothing really matters, anyone can see, nothing really matters, nothing really matters to me.'

Hermione watched as the dementors dragged her fiancé, her one true love, down the stairs, hearing him scream all the way to the bottom. A single tear trickled down her cheek as she realised that would probably be the last thing she would ever remember about him. As everyone else filtered back into the courtroom she stared down into the dark stairwell, whispering softly,

'Anyway the wind blows…'

b Well, what did you think? Leave a review and let me know! /b 


End file.
